The Longest Yard
by Hirosikata
Summary: He killed the one she loved. For all he had done, he must pay. Athrun is learning that the price of murder, even with the excuse of war, comes at far too high of a cost. AthrunMiri, hints of many others [complete]
1. Losers Never Win

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed nor any of the characters associated with it. There may be a bit of OOCness, but not a lot so it shouldn't really affect anything.

---------------------------------------

Chapter One: Losers Never Win

---------------------------------------

There were no words to describe how claustrophobic Miriallia sometimes got in the Archangel. It wasn't that she really minded closed in spaces, it was just that after a while the walls really got to her. She turned over so that she was facing the opposite bunk bed. It was the one Fllay used to use. They shared the small room as the two youngest women on the ship. That is, before Fllay left the Archangel. Slowly, she got up, eyeing the plain gray walls reproachfully. Her uniform was strung on Fllay's old bed and she quickly put it on after the cold air met her skin in a subtle shock. "This is home now," she distantly reminded herself. It would be home until the end of the war, whenever that would be. A series of knocks sounded from her metal door, echoing off the metal walls. "One minute," she called, scurrying to the door and unlocking it as she buttoned up the top of her uniform.

There was no need for her to unlock the room because in mere seconds Dearka had opened it and boldly strolled into her room as if he owned the place, "Yeesh," he commented; "If I had to live in here I think that I would get pretty bored and lonely."

She snorted, "Good thing, then, that you don't live here."

He grinned and she glared, "Want to go see the new GUNDAMs", he asked, referring to the Justice and the Freedom. She nodded. The only time that she had actually saw them were in battle, and then barely. She always seemed too busy to go and see them herself. "Aren't they on the Eternal right now?" She questioned. That was their carrier, so she didn't get why they would be on the Archangel.

Shrugging, he turned around, "Yeah, but for now they're on the Archangel. Different stats and stuff is being transferred, so they're here."

"Oh," she followed him down the hall, "So Kira's here?"

Dearka glanced at the trailing girl over his shoulder, "Yeah, he's here. He's one of your friends, right?" He had been learning a lot about Miriallia lately. He knew her likes, her dislikes, her friends, what her family was like, and a bit about her old boyfriend (although that information had been collected from Sai Argyle. He wasn't brave enough to ask her about the guy himself). He figured that it would come in handy when the war was over. He kind of wanted to ask her out.

They entered the hanger and she gasped at the new GUNDAMs. They were huge and incredible looking. The updates that had been put on the old ones were amazing and seemed to be more prepared for battle. Normally she wasn't one for looking at the giant weapons, but these astounded her to no end. "Wow," she gasped again.

Dearka smirked, "Pretty nice, huh? I'm planning on getting one of these someday soon."

Miri turned and looked at him, "Why are you planning on going back to ZAFT? The Three Ship Alliance doesn't exactly have the kind of time, power, money, status, or equipment now to make one of the new Mobile Suits."

Dearka grinned a little sheepishly, "I don't mean it like that, Miri. I mean, these are weapons, right? After the war they will still be weapons. I can get one then. When the war is over."

Still, Miri stood looking at him with a semi-glare imprinted on her face, "Whatever you say."

"Hey, I'm telling the truth!"

She smiled and giggled slightly, "I know. I know."

She put a hand to one of the GUNDAMs. The Justice. It seemed to deserve its name with its air of authority. She almost giggled. It was kind of funny thinking of a machine as authorative. But it was, so she didn't question it. She smiled and turned to Dearka to say something. But, in seconds that something was lost and her mind went nearly completely blank. Kira was there. Her friend, Kira, whom she hadn't seen in months. Excitement coursed through her body and would have run to him if it weren't for the teen standing next to him. He seemed older than herself, even though it was obvious that they were the same age. His eyes were old… she thought for a couple of seconds. 'More mature,' she found the correct term, 'He seems more mature than us.' With another look at him the air around her seemed to tighten a strict grip on her. "Who's he," she asked Dearka, glancing rapidly at the Coordinator talking to Kira.

Dearka looked carefully towards where she had glanced, "Athrun Zala… he used to be captain of our squad," he looked back towards Miriallia, "Why?"

She shook her head lightly. She couldn't describe what had just happened in words. "Nothing. Just a feeling, I guess."

He nodded offhandedly, but in reality he was worried. What if she thought it was one of those Love-At-First-Sight things? "Athrun is nothing to get excited about, if that's what you're thinking," Miriallia blushed and shook her head. That hadn't been what she was thinking at all. Dearka didn't notice the shake of her head and went on, "He's just your average Save-The-World I-Love-Naturals punk."

"What's wrong with Naturals?" She asked quietly, her voice quivering slightly from anger, and staring at him out of the corner of her eye.

Realizing what he had said, Dearka smiled unsteadily, "Nothing. It was- I mean- just out of-"

"Spite?" She supplied with furious force, "Anger, racism, habit?"

"Habit," he nodded, grateful for the correct word to describe what he had said, "Definitely habit."

Miriallia nodded in return, but glanced again at the new Coordinator. 'He…he seems…' she shook her head again. 'It's not familiarity that I feel…it's something else.' The two boys were serious, and, judging by their faces, more than likely talking about the war. Nobody ever talked about anything besides the war these days. Again she shook her head. Nothing seemed right anymore. Not since Tolle had died. A jolt swept through her body. Tolle… was dead. Sometimes she forgot. And it hurt to forget because somehow she always remembered. She could not forget her first love…it just wasn't completely possible. He was still there, grinning, in the back of her mind. He stood there with the belief that he was coming back. "I," she looked at Dearka, whom, she discovered, was looking down at her curiously, "I think I feel sick."

"Oh," there was some sort of disappointment in his voice, "Yeah." He regained his usual haughty tone and gave her a stern look, "You should get some rest. You Naturals can't take as much stress as we can." He laughed at her glare, "Okay, so _some_ Naturals can, but not all of them." Her glare increased and he gulped, "Naturals are every bit as good at controlling their stress as Coordinators?" It came out as a question.

She bobbed her head up and down, "Good enough. I'll see you later. I think that I am going to go take a nap." The pain didn't lessen as she walked away. 'Tolle,' she thought desperately, 'Why did you have to die?'

-------------------------------

There were only a few times when Dearka was genuinely surprised. This was one of them. Miri seemed to be getting better, in his opinion. She talked less about Tolle, he thought that she thought less about him, and it all seemed to be going well. Until times like this. Randomly she seemed to lose her cheer and good mood. He didn't know why and he decided he wouldn't question her as to why. Something just seemed to make her good mood die away and the depressing mood that she had been in when he met her returned.

For nearly ten minutes he stood looking at Athrun, wondering what about him had brought back that depressing mood. There was nothing particularly wrong with Athrun, besides the fact, of course, that he was a little bit of a goody-goody do-the-right-thing kind of guy. So what had made her freak out like that? She hadn't even talked to the guy as far as he knew and she said that she had a feeling when she looked at Athrun.

Suddenly, a chill ran through his body. She didn't like him, did she? She hadn't exactly denied it when he had asked her about it. "Dearka," Athrun called, waving him over, "Haven't seen you in a while."

Anger coursed through his veins. How did this guy get so easily onto the Archangel side? It had taken him weeks just to earn a bit of their trust and he did it in less than a week. "Yeah," he replied, walking coolly up to the duo. "I've been kind of busy."

"And you got captured," Kira reminded him, then, noticing the dark look that the teen gave him, held up his hands defensively and said somewhat apologetically, "Not that that's such a bad thing. You are on our side now, right?" He paused and looked towards where Miriallia had disappeared, "You know Miri?"

Both Dearka's and Athrun's heads whipped towards where Miri had disappeared in return. Dearka grinned somewhat cockily, "Yeah, you could say that. She's pretty cool."

Kira nodded, "Yeah, I know. We've been friends for a while… I haven't talked to her since…" The silence that ensued was uncomfortable and unwelcome.

"Yeah," Dearka shook his head apathetically, he knew the story, "It's been hard on her, but she's doing better."

Athrun looked curiously between them, "What happened?" His genuine interest somewhat shocked Dearka. Normally he would have just shrugged it off as something that he wasn't a part.

Sullenly Kira looked away, not quite able to meet either boy's eyes. He knew something that neither of them knew, "Her boyfriend was killed."

"In the war?"

"No," Dearka replied sarcastically, "He decided to make a bomb at home and blew himself up. Of course he died in the war!"

"Oh," Athrun looked away. He knew what it was like to lose someone special in his life. One of his best friends, Nicol Amalfi, had been killed, too. And by his other best friend, Kira, no less…

Kira looked at Athrun. "He was the guy in the Skygrasper that you destroyed." '…when I killed your friend.' The last part was left unsaid.

Athrun's eyes widened and his tone of voice had a surprised ring to it. "Oh."

"Yeah." The silence that ensued was to be expected. Dearka's eyes now widened in surprise. He did know that Miri's boyfriend had been killed; he just hadn't known that it had been Athrun doing the killing.

None of the boys seemed to want to continue the conversation and changed it as abruptly as possible. None of them were ready to face up to all of the woes of war. Dearka looked at Athrun somewhat expectantly. He was a goody-goody so he was more than likely planning on apologizing or something.

_Miri stood above him, knife out and ready to kill him. There was a crazed look on her face and fear swept through his body. 'God,' he thought, 'Please, don't let this be the end.' He had thought that she would actually be one of those nice little innocent Natural girls that his friends always bragged about being able to get into bed easily. They had actually met some girls, he supposed, on vacations with their rich families. He now knew that she wasn't one of those nice little innocent Natural girls. She was a demon in a pretty disguise. She didn't seem to care that he was just another human guy stuck in a war. It was almost like she could feel his hatred and gratefully returned it. She brought the knife out and slashed at his head, but only cut his skin lightly. Trying hard to avoid her next swings he backed up to the wall, narrowly avoiding the knife again and wishing that his hands and feet weren't bound. "Die," was the only thing coming from her mouth._

_She swung down again, a clear shot to his heart and he didn't have time to move. Luckily, someone's hands quickly had grabbed the knife and held her back…_

"I," everyone turned to look at Dearka and he tried to bite down the memory, but it wouldn't fade. He had been so afraid of Miri at that time, "don't think that it would be the best idea if we said anything to Miri about the fact that Athrun had killed her boyfriend."

"Why?" Kira asked, sensing the fact that there was a story behind this strange request. "And I thought that she already knew that he had."

Dearka shook his head. There was no need to tell them anything that they didn't need to know, "No. She knew that the pilot of the Aegis killed her boyfriend, but she didn't know that it was Athrun, per se. Just trust me. Don't tell her. Miri isn't…she isn't as…Just don't tell her."

Athrun's eyes narrowed, but he didn't push for answers. He had the feeling that this was one of those times he should trust Dearka's judgment. "Alright, I won't."

"I won't either," Kira agreed, but both knew that something must be extremely wrong for such a request. "But I'm going to want to know the story behind why someday."

Smirking, Dearka replied, "Someday I might tell you. But that day is not this day, so today, you're just going to have to wait." He looked at Athrun, then at Kira, "Now only one of the original five isn't here."

"What?"

"Yzak. He would make us a team of the original GUNDAM pilots." Dearka paused, "He's becoming stronger. I don't know how we'll fare with him against us, too."

"We'll just have to wait," Athrun told him commandingly. He always was the commanding sort despite his quietness, "He may come around."

"Yeah, right," was the snorted reply, "I somehow doubt that."

Kira grinned, "We'll just have to convince him to come over to our side."

"With what?"

Now Athrun grinned, remembering the old saying, "Milk and cookies." It had been a long time since he had joked around.

Dearka nodded, "With milk and cookies."

A/N: I'm going to try to write drama into this. I don't know how my drama will turn out. I've never actually sunk my teeth into a drama that I want out of this before. It's probably going to end up like one of those blatant failed-at-drama fics that I end up reading a lot now a days. This is actually going to be a lot less of a romance than I had expected it to be. I don't know, it's just turning out more angst-y than romance-y. Oh well, thank you for reading Chapter 1, and please review! Constructive criticism is appreciated.


	2. In the Heat of Battle

_Disclaimer_: I do not own Gundam Seed or any of the related characters.

**Chapter 2**: In The Heat of Battle

* * *

Miri hadn't meant to overhear a word of their conversation, she really hadn't. But, somehow she had. And now she wished that she really, truly hadn't even stopped. But, at the time, some part of her had wanted to hear what the teens would talk about. "Tolle." She whispered before sinking to the ground. "Tolle." Tears came to her eyes as she broke down into sobs. "Tolle." Suddenly, Athrun didn't look like a nice guy that she would like to have as a friend. Suddenly he was looking much more like the devil in disguise. Through her tears she managed to glare. No one deserved to live who killed her boyfriend. No one. "Dearka you liar," she hissed, but knew that she couldn't stay mad at her friend. He only wanted what was best for her. Even if he really didn't know what was best for her.

"Miri." It was Sai. The friend that somehow had gotten shifted out of her mind as her time on the Archangel continued. He was the friend that she continually forgot.

"Sai," she sobbed as she covered her face, trying to hide her tears. He didn't need to know any of her problems. She hadn't been a good enough friend to him.

"What's wrong," he asked, sitting down next to her, wondering what could be wrong with his friend even though he already knew. Tolle. Without waiting for her reply he enveloped her in a hug. "Shhhh, it's ok. Everything's all right." He knew what it was like to have someone taken, even if it wasn't by death. 'Fllay.' There were times when he really missed her. But, then there were times when he knew that he was better off without her.

There was no way to describe her pain. Friends were hiding that simple fact from her. The simple fact that nothing was very simple. "They lied to me," she whispered, clutching onto his uniform and her tears drying in anger, "They all lied to me."

Worry swept through Sai's eyes as he gazed at the brunette currently in his arms, "Who lied?"

"Dearka…Kira." There was pain in her voice; she didn't want to believe that they had really lied. She wanted what she had just heard to all be a figment of her imagination. She wanted this all to be a nightmare. But she knew it wasn't.

"What- what did they lie about?" Somehow, he really didn't want to know.

"Tolle. They're lying about Tolle." Her sobs broke out again.

Miri was supposed to be the strong one of them all. That was how Sai had always viewed her on Heliopolis. Sure, she turned to Tolle for encouragement and safety, but before that she had always stood her ground against whatever troubles were sent her way. But now that Tolle had died she was broken. Slowly she was healing, with the help of Dearka, but that healing seemed to be broken by one not-so-simple conversation. He missed the old Miri. The one who could stand on her own two feet with ease. The one who had been friends with everyone. He missed Tolle, whom helped her stand that way.

He struggled with carrying the sleeping girl to her room. He was strong, but the girl's depression seemed to add weight to her. Slowly he set her on her bed, " 'Night, Miri," he whispered as he turned out her light. Her face was red and puffy and nothing like the Miri that he had known since grade school. "Sleep tight."

The vague idea that he had on what was bothering her brought him to hunt down Kira and Dearka. He was almost convinced that Kira was changed and that he wasn't the same Coordinator that had helped the professor out whenever he could. There was just something different about him. He didn't really know Dearka that well to begin with, but that was no excuse for him lying to Miri about anything. When he found the two, they seemed to be chatting away with ease, the other Coordinator, Athrun Zala, making up one part of the group. Resentment must have rolled off him, because before he was even to the small group Kira asked what was wrong. The look in his eyes said that he still thought that it was something to do with Fllay. He was over Fllay, for the most part. He didn't need her to make him happy, "What are you hiding from Miri," his voice came out stale. This wasn't a conversation that he wanted to have.

"Wah-" Dearka looked at the Natural in surprise. "How do you know that we're hiding something from Miri?"

"She told me." The group went silent with that simple statement. "Now what are you hiding that seems so important?"

Silence still reigned until Athrun's, the one guy he didn't know, voice rang out, somehow emanating the calm and quiet that everyone wanted in his or her life. "I'm the one who killed Tolle Koenig."

He sucked in his breath, "I thought it might be something like that."

Her sobs could be heard from all the way down the hall. Athrun took a deep breath. He had to talk to her. It was just one of those things that needed to be said. Especially now that she knew. "Sorry," he whispered to himself noticing that no one else was around. He placed his head on the cold metal wall next to him, "I'm sorry that the war has led to so much killing. It has led to so much bloodshed that-"

He cut himself off. There was the girl herself standing outside of her doorway staring at him. Her eyes were red and puffy and her hair was disheveled. The military uniform she wore was crinkled, but somehow, through it all, she seemed to stand powerful and controlling. When her eyes locked onto his her glare intensified and she clicked a button to slam the door shut. A few moments later it swung open again and the girl came charging out as if she were charging into battle. He was taken by surprise as she came and full on punched him in the face. The feeling of blood dripping out of his nose came as she swung back to punch again. This time he knew what to expect and caught her arm in midair. "Stop," he commanded and she seemed to weaken, but still had the same fighting spirit.

"What did he ever do to you," she whispered, although it seemed louder than a scream. Her hair covered her face and he couldn't see the emotion that was in them, but he knew what was there: hatred. It was the kind of hatred that rang true; she had every right to hate him and everything he was. Her voice became louder, "What did he ever do to you?"

It was a question he couldn't answer. Tolle Koenig had done nothing to him. But he had to kill him anyway. It was a part of war. She somehow wriggled out of his grasp and slapped him across the face. The stung feeling coursed through his cheek and he caught both her hands again and pinned her to the wall, "Stop." Her muscles loosened then fell limp to her side and she slumped down to the floor, crying dryly. She had no more tears to shed, it seemed. "He didn't do anything to me." She didn't respond, only stared lifelessly at the ground. "But it is war and I did what I had to do."

"No," she whispered, looking up at him, eyes full of venom, "No!" She stood up abruptly and pushed him hard into the opposite wall. 'Where does she get this strength,' Athrun asked himself, but then he realized that strength could come from anger and hate. She had enough of both to kill the entire ZAFT army if she wanted to at the moment. "We all have choices. You made yours. You killed Tolle, you sick bastard!" With that she took of running to her room and shut the door, the familiar click of the lock echoed through the empty halls. Slowly, he seemed to lose the strength to stand and collapsed onto the floor. 'I don't even know her,' he thought to himself, 'And she already hates me.' He sat in silence for a few more minutes before Dearka came out from behind the corner he had been hiding behind.

"That went well." Athrun glared. Shrugging, he added, "Well, it wasn't much worse than when she blamed me for her boyfriend's death." Oh, it was worse. It was much worse.

--------

The pillow felt hard pressed against her aching body. "God," she cried out, "Why do I still feel like this? He was only doing what he was supposed to do." But, in her heart, she couldn't trust the man who had taken away her first love. Memories of Fllay rushed back to her. She had known the entire time what Fllay had been doing to Kira. She just hadn't said anything. It was Fllay's and Kira's business, not her own. She now understood Fllay's need for revenge, somewhat. There was a burning fire in the pit of her heart that kept her dark and depressed. It made her hate. But, she didn't care. It had felt so good to punch Athrun, as much as who she was back on Heliopolis would have hated to say. It felt good to slap him and push him into the wall. It had felt good to yell at him. But, it fueled the fire that was in her heart even more. She hated him. She hated him with every inch of her being.

Tolle's smiling face. She missed it so badly. The stupid Coordinator knew nothing of what it was like to lose someone like she had. She had heard his screams; she had seen him die. And that stupid Coordinator tried to explain war to her. He knew nothing of war! He was some stupid plaything that ZAFT had sent out. What did he know? Miri sobbed harder into her pillow. She had thought that she had no more tears to shed. Apparently she did. She could almost hear Fllay's familiar sleep talking.

_"Kill them, Kira," the girl whispered in her sleep. "Make them pay for what they did. She tried to tune out the insane girl's ranting, but she couldn't. "Kira, Kira, Kira, the only thing you can do now is to kill them all! Do it for me!…shhh, don't worry. I'll protect you." She let out a small laugh, "III'lll prot-ect y-o-u."_

'That's wrong Fllay,' she thought, watching the girl as she finally lulled into deep slumber, 'they did nothing that they didn't have to do. It's part or war.' She sat up and brushed the other girl's hair out of her face, "I trust you." She whispered. And she had. She trusted Fllay to make the right choice.

"No," she whispered. "I was wrong. Fllay was right. The pain…"

_"Hey, Miri." Tolle called, grabbing her around the waist. "Want to go see a movie this weekend?" _

_She blushed, "Do you mean…like a date?" She tried to keep the hopefulness out of her voice. _

_He grinned, "Yeah, I was thinking dinner and a movie. How does that sound? Wanna go?"_

_There was no way to keep the wide smile off of her face now, "Sounds great."_

Their first date. There was no way that Athrun could ever understand that. He had no feelings, the emotionless fool. "That sick bastard." She whispered, trying hard not to break down into tears. "I'm not like Fllay." She called out, trying to convince herself, "I don't hate Coordinators. I hate one man."

_She didn't want him to go out into the battle. She knew he was needed out there; Mu La Flagga and Kira couldn't handle everything on their own, but still, she didn't want him to go. But, she didn't voice her fears. Instead, she kept everything bottled up as he kissed her goodbye and said, "See you after this battle, Miri-chan." It wasn't often that he added –chan onto the end of her nickname. Just on special occasions. She didn't get how this was a special occasion. _

_"Yeah," she replied, somewhat half-heartedly, "After this battle." Somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew that there wasn't going to be a 'after this battle'. _

"Maybe if I made him stay on the ship. Maybe if I said something. Anything. Maybe he would be here now, beside me." She knew that there was nothing that would change the past. But, she could keep on hoping. "Tolle." She cried into her pillow, flipping over. "There's no revenge that I can give. He already knows I hate him. And, I'm not Fllay, I couldn't use him like she used Kira…" She thought for a few more seconds, "Hatred can break a person. It broke me." And it did. Her hatred broke her wide open.

----------

To Be Continued

----------

A/N: I was not expecting that to come out of this chapter, but oh well. OOCness on Miri's part, I think. But, I don't know, it's just how I can imagine reacting if I knew the person who killed my first love. Putting my self in Miri's shoes, ya know. But, I'm not Miri, so I don't know her reaction to the news.


	3. Thinking of You

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed. The next chapter won't be out for a while, I must warn you. First I need to buy the later DVDs for the series so I can review the battles (I only have number ten).

Chapter 3: Thinking of You

Dinner was horrible. It nearly always was. Having food that was made to last for months _every_ day sucked. Athrun sat picking at the 'turkey' and 'corn' (the terms were used loosely). "How'd it go," Kira asked as he sat down, also eyeing his food with distaste. Athrun glanced at the group of people Miri usually sat with. She wasn't there today.

"How do you think?" He didn't mean to snap at his friend, but he was mad. He didn't even know this girl yet he felt bad for her. He felt like he owed her something. For nearly two hours he sat in the room he had been given and tried to convince himself that he didn't owe her a thing. If anything, she owed him for giving him a bloody nose and slapping him. Kira glanced towards where Athrun had gazed, then his attention riveted to the other teen's cheek. It had a slight bruise on it, barely noticeable, but still there.

"Badly." He had never seen Miri actually act anything other than nice, sweet, and stubborn. He saw her cling to Tolle when she was afraid, but stick up for people when they were wronged. But, he had never even heard of Miri acting like the world was ending. But, then, he supposed, for her it probably was. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

Staring at his friend, he almost glared, but resisted, "What do you think you could do?"

Kira looked down, "I'm not sure. But, I've known her for a while, so maybe I could…"

Seeing Athrun's shake of the head he stopped, "She wouldn't listen. I can tell. And if she did, it wouldn't be from her own heart. She would be doing something for her friend, not for herself."

"Filling him in on the details, I see," Dearka smirked as he sat down, "I'm not sure if I'd call your position worse than mine was or not, Athrun."

Both teens looked at him. "Dearka," Kira began, looking nervously at the other teen, "What exactly was your position?"

"I thought I said that I wasn't going to tell you guys until I wanted to."

"I think that it's time you tell us," Kira demanded, "Especially if what happened to you was dangerous. Athrun's now in a similar position."

Dearka started to lean back before he realized that the bench he was sitting on had no back. "Fine, I'll tell you." He paused and looked around to make sure that no one else was listening, "Just remember that this is between us only." He looked between Kira's and Athrun's faces. They both knew. "I was captured…which both of you well know." He smirked, "I remember seeing Miri for the first time. She was cute to me. I commented on that and she cowered back, acting like a mouse caught by a cat. Soon after I was stuffed into a small, boring room and told to not make any trouble or there would be trouble for me." He smirked again, "There would be trouble for me no matter what I did or didn't do." Suddenly his smirk faded. "I don't know when she came, but I did know why she came. I was a Coordinator. She associated me with killing her boyfriend. And I actually had the nerve to insult him, too." He knew that he had caught the other boy's attention, "But that was before I saw the knife. She had taken me by surprise and got me right on the forehead once," he tapped the spot where he had a slight scar, "She went in again, and luckily missed. But, that had put me in an awkward position. She had the perfect position to kill me, especially with both my hands and my feet tied. There was nothing I could do. I was in shock and afraid…but, that guy," he nodded to Sai, "Had come in right in time to hold her back.

"I'm not quite sure what had happened after that, but I think it was something that the red-headed chick said."

"Fllay," Kira whispered and Athrun glanced at him, but didn't say anything.

"Yeah," Dearka continued offhandedly, "Fllay. She said some stuff about hating all Coordinators and wanting to kill them. She had a gun. I guess that struck a nerve with Miri because right when Fllay pulled the trigger she jumped on her and the shot missed…I'm not sure whether she actually saved my life when she was threatening it or not."

"Miri," Kira paused, trying to let the words sink in, "Tried to kill you? Because she thought that you killed Tolle?"

Dearka looked away, "Yeah." He looked at Athrun, "Be careful. When it comes to Tolle you never know what Miri's capable of."

Athrun nodded, "That I can believe."

"It just doesn't sound like Miri," Kira told them, shaking her head, "I didn't think that she relied on Tolle that much. She always seemed to stand on her own two feet most of the time."

"She must have for her to still have that reaction around Athrun," he glanced at Athrun now, whom had been mostly silent through the entire conversation, "Be careful. Try to talk to her, but don't force her to listen to you."

"I will and I won't."

------------

She was walking down a hall looking a little lost the next time he saw her. She was cleaned up and looked pretty. 'Pretty determined,' he thought disgruntled. 'But what's she determined for…' He was worried from what Dearka said. What if she went completely insane again and tried to actually kill him instead of just beating him up? 'I'll deal with that if it happens,' he decided, ignoring the feeling that everything was going to go wrong. "Miss Haww," he decided that calling her formally would be better for their current situation. She stopped and looked around for whoever called to her. When she saw him her eyes became stony and she walked the other way, pushing past whomever was in her way.

Breaking into a jog, he finally caught up with her, "Miss Haww." He called out when he was closer. She stopped and he could see her quivering. "I-I'm really." Suddenly, he didn't know what to say. What could you say in a situation like this? "I- war-" He couldn't get the words out no matter how hard he tried. It was unusual, usually he was able to talk without stuttering- now that he thought about it, he had probably only stuttered once or twice in his entire life.

"Save it." She barked as she spun around and poked him hard on the chest. "I don't want to hear it, and I don't need to hear it. You had a choice. You made your choice. Now my boyfriend's dead all because of you. What did he ever do?"

"He was fighting wasn't he?" Athrun asked quietly, shielding his eyes with his hair. "Being on the battlefield made him a target, just as it made me a target."

Her eyes softened a bit, before anger overtook her again, "You had a choice."

"And so did he."

Instead of replying, she took off down the hall. What right did he have to contradict her words and twist them to his own sick use? 'He's saying sorry,' a voice at the back of her mind told her, 'Shouldn't that be enough in this war? People are dying all the time. Everyone is someone's brother, son, sister, mother, boyfriend, or girlfriend. Even husbands and wives. What makes this situation so different?' "Shut up," she yelled once she reached an empty hallway, slamming her fist against the metal wall of the Archangel as she slid to her knees. "My case is different." She tried to convince herself, "My case was Tolle." 'How is that different?' "It just is," she whispered, trying to convince herself, "It just is." Athrun watched from a corner as the girl broke down crying again.

-----------------

For a long time Athrun sat in bed, gazing at the ceiling in a strange sense of wonder. 'There are so many things that make this war wrong, yet it was still going.' He turned and stared at the wall now, finding that the ceiling was rather boring, not that the wall was much better. 'Like life. If something gets you down, you keep on living. One bad day isn't going to kill you…in most cases.' There was no way he could sleep like he had planned on doing. There were too many things on his mind. 'I'm fighting to end the war. Funny how you actually have to fight to end a war. Complete hypocrisy.'

In Dearka's own words, his life was screwed up. He had never really thought of it as screwed up. For a while he was an elite soldier, fighting for his father like it was expected and engaged to the famous Lacus Clyne. Now he found that things were much different. He was part of the Three Ship Alliance, completely going against his father. And he would be blind if he couldn't see the small connection that Lacus and Kira seemed to have. Even if it was small, it was still there. They had never really had a connection beyond pure friendship. But, then, that's what he always thought marrying was about. A friendship. Now he knew better. His parents hadn't been in love, not at first, at least. When they were married they were only friends. That friendship grew to love. So, he had always thought that that was how marriage went. You did what your parents told you and hoped that it didn't screw up.

He nearly laughed, 'If you're supposed to marry for friendship I would have married Kira a long time ago.' Then, there was Cagalli. He didn't really know much about her, not really. He thought that he had, but then she changed. The fact that she was a princess was revealed and she lost her father. Kira had somehow managed to become her brother. She showed him more of the loving friendship. The kind that he would have married for. But, he knew that they didn't love each other. Not that way. He had always kind of thought that she was too good for anyone. It was more of a protective thought than anything, almost brotherly. More like a best friend than a lover.

Miriallia Haww knew true love. That he easily induced. And none other than himself had ripped that true love out of her hands. "Perfect," he whispered, thinking about the half insane girl who insisted on physically abusing him. Not that he didn't deserve it. Her breakdowns and constant crying only served to prove how much she had loved her boyfriend, Tolle Koenig. He shook his head; she obviously was more in love with one boyfriend, and her first one according to Kira, than he had ever been with Lacus, whom was his fiancée. "Pathetic." It was the perfect word to describe them both. Both him and Miriallia Haww were pathetic. And that was just pathetic. It was pathetic the way she seemed to try to change what had happened, tried to extract revenge on him and make him feel pain. It was pathetic how much her revenge actually hurt him. He didn't even know the girl, yet her constant yelling and screaming and glares and abuse hurt him more than anything. And he knew that he deserved it.

He deserved every insult she hurled at him because the bottom line of it all was that he _did_ kill one of her loved ones. He _did _hurt her. And nothing would change that. Neither of them could change that, no matter how badly they wanted to. "This whole thing is pathetic," he whispered, trying to fall asleep. But, he knew that it really wasn't all that pathetic. He just needed someone to console him, even if that person was himself. "She doesn't realize how good she has it." And Miri didn't, but no one was going to tell her that.

------------------

Disclaimer: Argh, now I think that I got Athrun out of character. Miri's out of character for a reason, but Athrun just some how got out of character. Goodness, I'm such a doof. Well, there was very little, if any, character development here. Oh well. Thank you for reading and (hopefully) reviewing.


	4. A Price To Pay

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed. It has been a while since I've updated. Sorry about that. I think that I've said this before, but soon things might start speeding up a bit, since this is a mini-fic. For some reason, I feel as though this chapter is extremely important, I just can't put a finger on why.

Chapter 4: A Price To Pay

"Level One Battle Stations," the Captain shouted over the speakers situated in the hallways of the Archangel. As quickly as she could, Miri climbed out of bed and pulled on her uniform for a quick dash down the hall to the Bridge. She ignored the nightmares that had haunted her sleep. Tolle's face…it seemed to be disappearing from her mind. She hadn't forgotten one of their dates or one of his smiles, but his actual _face_ was slipping from her mind and that made her want to cry harder than anything else. She didn't know when she realized she couldn't remember Tolle's exact features, the shape of his eyes, the size of his nose…everything that wasn't important had become a blur in her mind. She had no pictures to recall what he looked like…at least none developed. All the ones that had been on Heliopolis had been destroyed and there hadn't exactly a lot of cameras on the Archangel.

"What's happening to me," she asked quietly. Things were going wrong all the time. How could she forget what her boyfriend looked like? She stumbled through her dash and managed to bump into Dearka, dressed in his Mobile Suit uniform and ready to fight. He looked at her in worry, she could see it in his eyes, but he didn't say anything, only looked back and smirked cockily when she called out, "Don't get killed." 'Don't make me lose someone else.' Kira was the next one she saw, jogging behind Mwu la Flagga, whom grinned and nodded as he passed. "Good luck," she whispered before she saw Athrun steadily jogging behind the other three. Her eyes hardened, but she didn't say anything. He was someone's son, cousin, lover, whatever. She wouldn't wish him good luck, but she wouldn't wish him ill will.

-----

The battle was fierce. It was almost unbelievable, "Kira, watch to your left. There's a GINN approaching." The ship was crazy with hysteria. Perhaps it wasn't quite as bad as it seemed to Miriallia, but in Miri's mind everything was going crazy.

"Miriallia, we're switching your communications," a man called to her.

Her eyebrows rose, but she fought the urge to reply, 'Why?' The man was her superior and if he switched her, then that was that. "What suit?"

"The Justice."

Her face froze as she stared at her controls. Athrun's voice met invaded her headset, "Hello? Is anybody there?"

Quivering, she answered, "This is Haww."

"Miriallia, is there anything that I need to know going on around me?"

Mentally she shook her head, "No, you've got it covered." There were a few seconds of silence, only broken when Athrun broke into a war cry. Her hands were starting to shake. She couldn't handle being there… having to help him win.

"Miri, are you there?" He called again into her headset, "I need help. I need backup." She couldn't handle this. She really couldn't. Tears started pouring down her face.

"I-I can-n't do t-this," she sobbed as she flung her headset down and ran from the room. She heard the cries of the other soldiers for her to come back, but she couldn't. She wanted to run until she was so far away from the war and from Athrun that she could just forget about everything. Unluckily for her, the ship wasn't quite that big.

-----

Pain. That's all he saw now when he looked at Miri. There was pain that was inflicted upon her and there was the pain that she inflicted upon others. Pain she inflicted on Athrun. He shook his head as he jogged to catch up to the brunette. Quietly and carefully he grabbed her arm and spun her around, surprising her, although not by much. "I've missed you."

It was the only thing that he could think of. He had missed his best friend whom was a girl beyond belief, but that wasn't what he had wanted to say. She smiled softly, a strange difference from the looks of death she sent towards Athrun. "I've missed you, too." He nodded. He already knew that. Dearka had told him. She smiled again, this time it had a sad tone to it. "I know what you're going to say. I'm not stupid, just…"

"Furious, angry, riled up?"

"Something along those lines," she laughed, but it didn't come from her heart. "You want to talk to me about Athrun. There is nothing to talk about. I hate him."

"You don't know him." Kira pointed out. He wanted his two friends to be friends, but it didn't look like that was going to happen in time soon.

"I know enough."

"No," Kira grabbed her arm, with more force than he had ever done before. 'Kira…' her thought trailed off as she looked into the desperate boy's eyes, "You only know that he killed Tolle and you seem to think that that's enough. What else do you know about him?" At her silence, he nodded, "Nothing. Athrun's quiet and nice and really the only person whom had ever acted like you are around him was one of his fellow pilots. When he came onto this ship he didn't expect your hatred. He didn't want your hatred. He didn't even know who you were. All he knew at the time when he was a pilot was he had to follow orders and Tolle was the enemy. The enemy gets killed. Tolle died, but on the other side, if Tolle had killed Athrun, then Athrun would now be dead.

"Dearka and I had been telling him about you before he had actually met you. To him, you actually sounded a bit cool. Now I just don't know Miri. What's happened to you? Where did the Miri whom I had known for so long go?" He paused as if just thinking of something before continuing, "How could you leave your battle station like that? Athrun needed you, and you left him. You'll be punished."

She was silent for a few moments before looking down, tears, this time not for Tolle, brimming her eyes, "You wouldn't understand, Kira. You just wouldn't understand." With that she ran down the hall, preferring it to the weightless gliding along at the moment. She could get somewhere faster. Where she wanted to go, she didn't know.

----

She turned to Sai, not really knowing where else to go. All of this hatred inside of her was starting to hurt. "Sai," she cried, standing beside him and looking down, "I-I don't know what to do anymore."

Sai looked at Miri. Somehow, when Athrun arrived, she turned fragile. Knowing the killer of her boyfriend did something to her more than anything else did. But somehow, he got the feeling that whatever Athrun did, it was different than what they all had expected. "What's wrong?"

He already knew what was wrong, but he was asking for the deeper meaning. She looked at him, her eyes no longer filled with tears that needed to be shed. It kind of reminded him of himself when Fllay had dumped him for Kira. He had been broken hearted and wanted to die from the pain that was in his heart. But, he knew that it was different on so many levels. Tolle had died, not been taken away by a friend. "I-I can't remember him. I can't remember his face. It's all a blur!"

Suddenly the thought struck him, "You don't need him anymore, Miri." He patted her on the head, smiling slightly, "He's dead, but you're alive. It's time to move on."

"I can't." She looked away, "I thought I could after I met Dearka, but now I realize I can't. He's still there. He's still in my heart. I feel like he's constantly watching me. If I try to move on, he'll be mad and I'll feel like I cheated on him. I can't feel like that. I just can't!"

"Nobody's asking you to. Tolle would want you to be happy," he was surprised no one had told her that before. Knowing Tolle, it was true. All he wanted was the happiness and the safety of those he loved, "If moving on is what will make you happy, then Tolle would have understood that. No one's asking you to fall in love or to start dating yet, Miri. But, you've got to realize that you're not happy wallowing in the past." He smiled, "Tolle will forever be in your heart, but it's time you moved on."

Miri nodded and gave the boy a tight hug, "When did you get so smart?"

"I've always been smart," he said, if not a little forlornly, "I've also been always overshadowed."

A/N: Thank you for reading this chapter. Remember, I love constructive criticism, so please review.


	5. Forget Not Your Enemies

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed or any related characters. Thank you my reviewers. Please, let me know how I'm doing with this story and the plot line and the characterizations.

Chapter 5: Forget Not Your Enemies

There was no way to describe the feeling of panic she had when she woke up the next morning. 'How did I get here?' Looking around she finally noticed the slim body of none other than Athrun Zala sleeping in the next bed. 'Damn you Sai,' she thought in anger, looking at her enemy as he slept quietly. She took a closer look. "Know your enemy well," she whispered to herself. No morning dawn lit up his face, but it looked like it had. His eyes were closed and he was rolled on one side facing her, a slightly troubled look flitting across his face. She had to stop herself from brushing his blue hair from his face. It looked soft. "Damn it," she whispered as quietly as she could. 'What is he doing here?' The only thing she remembered was talking to Sai. That was it. She remembered feeling tired; her emotions had started to catch up with her and taken toll on her body.

A distant conversation played into her mind. She must have been half asleep when she had heard it.

"_What are you doing?"_

_"She fell asleep and I'm trying to take her to her room."_

_The first boy replied, "I'll carry her if you want me to. I'm probably stronger than you."_

_"Yeah…you're right, I'm just not so sure how she'd react if…"_

_"She won't wake up, I promise."_

_"You sure you can carry her? You look kind of tired. That last battle must have worn you out."_

_"It's nothing I can't handle…not that you can't handle it…"_

_"If she wakes up, try talking to her."_

_"I don't think talking is going to be on my mind."_

_"Huh?"_

_"She's very…abusive…"_

The rest of the conversation faded from her mind. It seemed like he had actually been tired because he was just sprawled on the bed, not covered with blankets or anything. 'Sai actually let this creep carry me to my room?' But, it seemed that her previous swearing had started to wake the boy up and he slowly opened his eyes. "Where am I?"

"My room." Her voice didn't hold its usual venom, but it wasn't kind either. It was the most monotonous thing that she had ever said.

He glanced at her before his eyes widened and he sat up abruptly, "I-I'm sorry. I should go." He was obviously afraid of her. Especially now that they were alone in a room where she would have the perfect chance to kill him if she wanted and no one would know or hear a thing for a long time. Or, at least until he was needed in the next battle.

She sighed, "I'm not sorry, but I won't hit you again." She sat back down on her bed, "It was something that I had to do."

Surprise filled Athrun's eyes and he nodded, "How should that be taken?"

Miri looked at him not smiling, "We're not friends. We probably never will be friends with the way I feel. I hit you. I won't anymore. I'll never forgive you for killing Tolle. That's how it should be taken."

He nodded, "So nothing has changed." He looked at her now; eyes stone cold. She nearly gasped at how strange and mean the look was on him, but instead she met his look head on, "I won't apologize anymore either. You've made it obvious that it's a pointless thing to do." He stood up and made the bed look a little neater, not looking at her; "I won't try to talk to you anymore, although being in the same group at the same time seems unavoidable. We have the same friends."

She nodded, "I know."

"So you're still my enemy…"

He said it in a whisper, almost like she didn't want him to hear it, but she did anyway, "Yes. I'm your enemy. You'll find many wherever you go." Now she smirked in a very un-Miriallia-y fashion, "You can trust that I'm among the worst."

Nodding, he started to exit the door, "Then there's nothing more for me to say to try and change your mind about me."

She shook her head, "No. But you should be fine with that. It's not like I'm going to attack you anymore." 'Talking to Kira and Sai have helped me learn better than that.' "But I will still never like you. We'll never be friends."

"I know." He started down the hallway, and whispered to himself, "I think I always knew that."

She paused and watched the boy walk out of her room, and she got the feeling, out of her life, "Thanks for bringing me to my room."

Athrun spun around and nodded before resuming walking again. Somehow it felt like a piece of her was missing as she watched him walk away.

----

He tried to understand the way Miriallia thought. He just couldn't. His mind refused to even think one step into her twisted logic. 'At least she didn't try to hit me.' It was the one thing he could be thankful for. She would never be his friend, but she would never hit him again. He tried to keep thinking of it as a fair trade. But, inside he knew it wasn't. He wanted the kind of friendship with her Dearka and Kira had told him about. Knowing that he was breaking her hurt, though. There was no way he wanted to do that to her. If her not talking to him and him not talking to her fixed that, then so be it. That was what he was going to do. There was more than just himself to think about, anyway.

But he was still angry beyond belief. She didn't even know him, yet she judged him. Someone whom both Dearka and Kira claimed to be nonjudgmental was judging him without knowing him at all. "This is so stupid," he tried to tell himself. He didn't need her. Technically he didn't need anyone. He was a Coordinator and perfectly able to thrive on his own. He leaned against the metal wall and sighed, "It's not like I want her to be my friend anyway." He leaned in silence for a few more minutes, "I don't want her to be my friend." The phrase didn't roll of his tongue the way it should have. "I want her to be my friend." Even just testing it out, it sounded much better than saying the other two and rolled off his tongue easier. "She _is_ my friend." That rolled the best. He closed his eyes, "Friendship doesn't have to come from both sides. Just one person wanting to be close to the other is enough." That's what he tried to tell himself.

In his mind he tried to define friendship. Someone you can talk to, someone who understands you and help you through your pain, a person who can help you stand on your own two feet. A friend was someone who knew who you were and didn't try to change that, instead, liked you the better for it. He nodded. He could help Miriallia with some of the things. Or, so he thought. She seemed awfully hard to get close to at the moment. She wouldn't talk to him; not like a friend would, but he could talk to her like that when he had to. If him not being near her eased her pain, then he would take that sacrifice. Eventually she would cool off. That he was convinced about. And then, he could help her stand. And now he knew whom she was and what she was going through and he wasn't going to try to change that (maybe just the part about her not liking him, but that was OK). He was going to fulfill the definition of a friend and he would do it gladly just for her.

"I'm so stupid," he berated himself, "Why do I want to be her friend so badly?"

"Because she's Miriallia and she's cool." Dearka smirked as he walked up to the confused teen. "Because you think that she has no right to hate you and want her to realize that. Because of what Kira and I have told you. There are hundreds of reasons to want to be her friend and you probably fit the bill for them all."

"You're right," Athrun stood up strait, "But that doesn't mean that I should have this urge to be her friend."

Dearka smirked, "True, you never had the urge to be Yzak's friend and he hated you. Maybe it's the fact that you like Miri. As in actually _like_ her, in the way that you should like Lacus. Why, I couldn't tell you. How you started liking her when you don't know her, I also don't know. But, then again, I guess you could also know about her than any of us."

There was nothing he could say to argue because Dearka had a point. But he didn't think that he was in love with Miri. He just wanted to be her friend. He just wanted to be her friend for a reason he didn't understand. "I don't think so." Neither knew what he was saying that to. The fact that he knew more or the fact that he was in love with her. "I've got to go."

Dearka stared at the pilot as he made his way down the hall, "You're running away Athrun." He called out, "And seeing Athrun Zala run from anything is something that I never thought I'd see in my life." He smirked. Somehow, although the two weren't that good of friends, he knew that he had struck a nerve. But it was true. He never thought that he'd see Athrun run from anything, but he was running now. 'There's a first time for everything.' He thought as he saw Athrun nearly stop from the impact of what he said. 'He'll come around, though. I know it.'

There was a slight pang in his heart. He hated the idea of them together. There was no denying that. But, there was nothing he could do. Not now, anyway. There was something there that he just couldn't add into. 'She still likes me more,' he reminded himself with a self-satisfied smirk, 'She still likes me more. I still have a chance.' That was all the encouragement he needed.

A/N: An odder chapter in my opinion. I hope that I got them all in character. I want Miri to start cooling down and Athrun and Dearka to just be their normal selves. What do you think?


	6. The World On Fire

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed. If I did, a lot of things would have been different in the series. OK, I've been told that I'm rushing it, but I really don't have the time to edit through all of this. So, I'm just going to post the last 3 chapters as is, and when I finish Caught in the Dust, I'll come through and re-edit it.

Chapter 6: The World On Fire

"What do you think of the new designs for GUNDAMs," one of the soldiers on the Archangel asked. In truth, he couldn't even think properly, let alone answer such a simple question as fully as he would have like to. His head was too full of thoughts from his previous conversation with Dearka to pay much attention to anything at the moment. Choosing not to reply, he simply nodded and walked away, too wrapped up to notice the odd looks he was getting from his fellow soldiers.

'So what if I like her,' he thought to himself, trying hard not to sound harsh and berating. How could he fall for someone who obviously hated him? 'It doesn't really matter. It's not like I'm going to tell her.'

A sudden image of Miriallia from the first time he saw her flashed into his mind. Instead of the disheartened look she often wore now, she was smiling brightly at Dearka as if he were the only person in the room. 'Even if I wanted to, I wouldn't tell her.' Not that he wanted to. If he ever told her it would be when she didn't hate him. As if that would ever happen. 'I-I want to talk to her.' The realization didn't come as quite the shock that he had half expected it to, but it came as a shock nonetheless. In no time he found himself down the hall and heading to her room before he stopped himself. 'I don't want to talk to her.' He tried to convince himself and failed miserably.

Just as he brought his hand up to knock on her door, it slid open, taking him by surprise. Apparently, it had also taken her by surprise because she screamed and jumped back, he barely dodging his fist coming sailing at her face where the door had just been. For a few seconds they both stood in silence, neither one of them knowing quite what to say. Finally trying to redeem himself, he smiled nervously, becoming aware of the glare that she was sending him. 'I can't forgive you…' The memory of her voice echoed in his mind, making him visibly cringe. She seemed to take this as a sign that he had been beaten and smirked, "I thought that you said that you weren't going to try to talk to me anymore."

Shrugging, he turned away, "Who said that I wanted to talk?"

"Eh?" Miri stood back in surprise, her face reddening, "What?"

Suddenly realizing what he had just said, he blushed, too, and looked away, "That- I mean… no, that's not what I meant to say."

"Of course it isn't," she said, walking out of the doorframe and, in his opinion, increased the proximity between them greatly. While he proceeded to turn red, she didn't seem to notice a thing. Her face remained in a strange state of blankness mixed with anger. Quite an odd combination he noticed, but didn't comment. Running her key through the door lock and hearing a familiar '_Bleep' _she turned back to him, "So what were you going to say?" There was blatant curiosity in her voice, even if it didn't carry all the way to her face.

Turning around and beginning to walk down the hall, he replied, "I don't know."

Giving her one last glance, he was surprised by the amount of anger that clearly showed on her face. It wasn't the same kind of anger and hatred that she usually had, but rather one of embarrassment. He hadn't thought that he had embarrassed her at all. After all, he had hardly said anything, "Then why did you come here?" Although she had said that she didn't want to talk to him, she seemed awfully eager now, "Do you want to apologize again?"

"No," he spun around and this time stared her down, "I told you that I was through with apologizing to someone who won't accept a word that I say."

The irritation that laced his voice must have surprised her more than usual and her eyes widened and her mouth dropped, "Then…why are you here?"

Again he shrugged and turned around. She almost missed his reply, "I don't know."

Though he could feel her glare on the back of his head, he continued walking away. "I don't want you to talk to me!" She screamed, and once again it seemed entwined with the pain and suffering that went on inside of her. He cringed at how hurt she had sounded.

"I don't want to talk to me either," he whispered, but, this time, she couldn't hear what he said. In his opinion, that was a good thing.

----------

There was little she could do to contain her anger to a manageable amount. Her insides burned and she wanted to hit something. But it wasn't because of Athrun. Not him as a person, at least. It was just because of what he had stood for. And she wanted nothing to do with that. In a rush of anger she had ran all the way to Kira's room, trying to make some sense out of what she was feeling and how it didn't seem to connect to what she was saying. Her thoughts were jumbled and even though Kira wasn't the smartest person in the world when it came to feelings, at least he was someone she could talk to without feeling guilt. With Sai, she constantly knew that she hadn't been a very good friend and that she didn't deserve him. At least she knew where she stood with Kira.

Quickly she knocked on the door. And she waited. And waited. In the back of her mind she knew that he probably wasn't there, but she had to wait anyway. There was nothing else she could do and her mind refused to think of waiting until later to talk to him. She needed to talk now. "Are you OK, Miri?" She felt a hand on her shoulder, spinning her around from the wall she had been leaning on.

"Kira." She had said his name without much emotion, yet her heart swelled with happiness. She had thought that he would never come and she would be left here to rot. "I-I wanted to talk to you."

He glanced over her, taking in her slightly disheveled appearance, but tear-free face, almost in surprise "Alright," he opened the door, "Come in." Without another word she plopped onto his bed and buried her face into his pillow. For a few moments they both sat in silence, each waiting for the other to speak first. Finally, Kira took the initiative and said, "What's up?"

Pausing for a second, she answered, "I-I don't know what to do anymore." At the look in her eyes, the look that said she wanted to cry, he sat down beside her and patted her back comfortingly. "I- I feel so messed up." Slowly, she lowered her head, "I'm forgetting Tolle and I don't want to."

Looking at his friend, Kira suddenly felt all the insecurity that she had been hiding for a long time. More than likely longer than anyone ever knew. Much longer than since Tolle died. "It's okay, Miri." Kira patted her back and squeezed her shoulder, trying to be comforting, but realizing all the same that he was horrible at it, "It's okay…not to stay so wrapped up in the past. Sometimes you forget things."

"Like what?"

"Friends," he held out one finger, "Family," he held up another, "And sometimes how to be yourself." It had to be one of the smartest and worst things that he had ever said. "Does that make any sense?"

"Yeah," she sighed. Despite how much she wanted to say no, that it confused her more, she had to be honest. What he said did make sense. When she was wallowing in the past, the death of Tolle to be more exact, she had forgotten about a lot of things. "It does."

"Can I ask," Kira looked away, cheeks flushing pink in embarrassment, "What has made you confused…what- what has been making you forget Tolle?"

Suddenly looking down, she also flushed in embarrassment, "Athrun. I don't know why, but he has been making me forget. Sometimes… I wonder how I can hate him so much when he is so nice. Sometimes I don't feel like I hate him at all."

Practically feeling his heart bulging with happiness, he asked, "Does that mean that you are willing to be friends with him now?"

Her head snapped up and now her cheeks flushed with anger, "I will never be friends with him!"

'That…' he thought to himself, 'Doesn't make any sense if you don't hate him most of the time.' "Are you sure," he questioned, studying her face, "Are you sure that you don't want to be friends with him?"

Her face flushed darkly with anger and for a second he thought that she was going to hit him, but instead she turned on her heal and stormed out of the door. When she was safely out of earshot, he let out a sigh of relief, 'I thought that she was going to hit me…'

--------

Before she had even seen him she knew that she was going to run into him. It was fate that had brought them together she had decided. And it was fate that was going to keep them together, forever on the brink between enemies and friends. Still furious that Kira had suggested that she be a friend to him, she rammed right into him, nearly pushing him into the wall nearby. "Who do you think you are?" She screamed. At the moment it was all that she could do, her feelings and emotions were on such a high, "Do you ever think about how anybody else feels?"

For a few moments he was quiet, before breaking out with, "Me? What about you? All I've been trying to do is help you and here you come yelling at me like it's really going make a difference. You're boyfriend's dead and nothing will bring him back." Realizing what he had just said, he clamped a hand over his mouth and looked away abruptly, with a shy and forlorn look in his eyes. He knew when he had crossed the line. "I-I didn't mean…"

Glancing at Miri, he realized she wasn't looking at him, but down at the ground. "Nothing will change the fact that he's dead." She whispered barely audibly, "But that doesn't mean anything you say can erase him from my mind." In an abrupt change of pace, she ran down the hall away from him, tears streaming down her face.

Groaning, he put his head against the wall. 'What have I done?' He thought. There was nothing he could do to take back what he had said. It had been said in a moment of anger and he wished more than anything he could take it back. 'Why can't I just keep my cool?'

---------

The tears had stopped long ago for Tolle. She knew that. The fact that he was dead wouldn't be erased from her mind, though. And the fact that this Coordinator who seemed to know everything killed him made her want to hit something or someone. It wasn't necessarily Tolle that brought tears to her eyes she now knew that. She couldn't believe that she couldn't sense it before. It was more so the fact that Athrun Zala was right and she knew it that brought tears to her eyes. He was always right and she hated it.

'Coordinator…' she thought with indifference. She was no Fllay. She could never hate Coordinators for all that they were worth. But she could hate this one. But she couldn't hate this one. Something inside wouldn't let her. 'How did Fllay get by acting like she didn't hate Kira…' Fllay had always said that the best things in life came when she actually had to do a little work for them. She wondered how much Fllay had worked to seduce Kira. 'He was already in love with her, so probably not much.' She could never have that overall hatred for Coordinators that she had had.

Kira and Dearka were both important figures in her life and she could never hate them, although she could get angry with them. 'Kira,' she thought. They had always been great friends back on Heliopolis but as time went by they had grown apart. She never knew whether she should be on Fllay's side or his. But now the friendship that they had on Heliopolis was coming back stronger than ever. And for that she was extremely glad.

Dearka…he was another story. Besides Kira, he was one of the first Coordinators she had ever met. She had hated him because she had thought of him as the killer of her boyfriend. Now he was one of her best friends. Although sometimes she got the feeling that he wanted more…and sometimes she got the feeling that she wanted more, too. Just not from him most of the time. Her thoughts strayed from the subject as she sipped on coffee from the recreation room and headed toward her own room. Maybe everything would turn out all right in her life. As long as she didn't talk to Athrun anymore. That seemed to always cause problems. Not that she wanted to talk to him anyway.

A/N: Two more chapters to go. How did you like it?


	7. Worlds Collide

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed or any related characters. I hope you enjoy this next chapter. I was having some trouble uploading for the past week on so I hope that this makes up for it.

Chapter 7: Worlds Collide

"Come on, it isn't that hard," he told her, holding her hands and dragging her closer to him. "You just need the right teacher."

With the sudden fear, she turned away from him to stare at the gentle waves flowing beneath them on the dock. "B-but I can't!" She exclaimed, not caring how childish she was being. "I don't want to learn how to swim. I'll get myself killed!"

He smiled at her softly, "You won't get killed, I'll be right here beside you. Remember that."

Slowly, she turned to face him again. "Thank you Tol- Athrun!"

Instead of looking at her with the sadness and sympathy she was used to seeing, he was smiling at her completely, even in his eyes. "What? Who did you think I was?"

She was confused, "Tolle."

"Who's Tolle?" He laughed, trying to pull her to him.

Suddenly she yanked herself from his grasp and edged backwards, "Tolle. My first boyfriend. The boy you killed!"

"What are you talking about," his face showed his confusion, "_I_ am your first boyfriend."

"What?"

Chuckling softly, he stepped towards her, taking advantage of her silent stupor, and wrapped her in his arms, "You heard me," he was grinning into her ear and somehow she could feel it. There was a sudden brush against her cheek and she knew that he had kissed her. Looking strait into his eyes, she could sense his sincerity. His face was inching towards hers she dimly noticed, but didn't care. Just a few more centimeters…

-----------------

She woke up in a cold sweat. Every bone in her body was shaking with fear. She was forgetting Tolle and her mind was starting to forgive Athrun. Just, her heart wasn't there. Or, at least she hoped it wasn't. If her entire being wasn't ready to forgive Athrun, for which it never would, then she wouldn't acknowledge dreams such as these. She had to act as though they had never happened.

"There's little that I can do," she thought to herself, "To correct what had happened to Tolle…" Where was she going with this? Although it was her own mind thinking it, she didn't understand what was happening. "There's also little that I can do to sway the feelings in my heart." Where had that come from? Her mouth seemed to be speaking of its own accord. Even if there was no one else here to hear her, she still didn't like it. It was just kind of creepy. "Feelings…" She continued, in spite of the horrible dread that she had. Strange how her body contradicted itself, "for Athrun."

There. She had said it. And the dread that she had thought that she would feel didn't stop. Instead it overwhelmed her, leaving her short of breath and clutching the wall beside her bed for support. Tears poured down her face, silently; she was too overcome with emotion to make any noise. She didn't want to fall in love with Athrun, just as she didn't want to fall out of love with Tolle. With a barely audible sob, she fell sideways and off her bed, landing hard on the cold floor, her blanket spread out around her, hanging limply off the bed.

"Tolle," she sobbed, "I don't want to forget you. I will never forget you. But, I want to be friends with Athrun. Dear lord, do I want to be friends with him." It scared her to know how much she cared. It scared her to know that she wanted to know the killer of her boyfriend. "I know that he killed you. I will never forgive him for it. But… I want to know him. I want to know how he thinks and feels. He had no right to kill you. Never had he the right to kill you. War is not an excuse, just like my dog ate my homework isn't." She let out another sob, louder and more fear stricken. The feelings bubbling inside her were something to be feared greatly, "He can't just go around killing people."

With another sob, she pounded on the floor as hard as she could and pulled the blanket down on top of her, trying to protect herself from the cold like she would have before Tolle died. She thought that she was over this; she thought that she was done crying for Tolle. Although she had locked her door earlier, she could now hear it sliding open as someone reached down and patted her on the back. She swung around and threw her arms around that person, trying to find some sort of comfort from the slight touch. No one had actually thought about her when Tolle died. Yes, she cried and she cried, but she couldn't remember receiving one hug or anyone giving her their condolences. The battle at hand had been far too important for that, as was the fact that Kira was missing and they had to find him. After all, he was the important one on the Archangel.

She glanced at whom she was hugging and nearly screamed in surprise. Mwu la Flagga. He grinned sheepishly at her, but then turned to a more serious demeanor than she normally saw him. He loosened her grip on him, and patted her on the head, "How are you doing?" It may have been the stupidest question she had ever heard, considering the tears running down her cheeks and the fact that she had actually clung to him in a rather needy way. Right now, instead of being the cool older man that was always willing to make someone laugh, he was more like her mother than anyone else. As if sensing her answer, he grinned sadly, almost grimly, "Stupid question, right?"

She hadn't meant to, but she nodded, and then flushed with embarrassment. She had called one of the officers on the ship stupid out loud and on accident. He chuckled lightly, "Don't worry. I can have my dull moments and I'll admit to them proudly." He patted her on the head again, "Still crying for your boyfriend?"

"Yeah," she said, her voice small. She wasn't quite sure how she was supposed to act with this man… although she knew him, she wasn't at the level where she was willing to talk about her feelings and all of that type of stuff. "I guess."

"I heard you banging on the floor and crying from down the hall," he looked at the door, "War can do strange things. It can kill some and leave others to breathe what should be other's air…" At her questioning look, he shrugged in a way that said he had his own scores to settle, "From what I hear, you fight with Athrun Zala a lot."

Pausing, she answered truthfully, deciding momentarily that that might be the best way to go, "I'm not sure whether I should hate him or make him one of my friends. He's not… I don't…" She stopped, trying to search for the words to describe how he was feeling, "He killed my boyfriend and I don't think that I could ever… forgive him for that. And I'll never forget it. Every time I look at him I'll see Tolle."

Mwu nodded as if considering what she was saying, "I can understand how you feel." As if searching deep inside of himself to see if he could say what he wanted to, he took a deep breath, "Sometimes I just want to withdraw from this war and this world. I've lost a lot of friends and I don't think that I want to kill the machines that killed them. My friend Robert Strong was killed by a ZGMF- 1017 GINN, my other friend was in the Earth Alliance Navy Division. He was killed in an attack on the ship. From what I was told, a GINN mobile suit. I understand what you're going through. I've had a lot of people important to me die."

Wiping the tears from her face, Miri asked quietly, "I can't help but think of him as a murderer."

"Hey," Mwu la Flagga attempted a cheerful smile in spite of the atmosphere, but failed miserably, "If you consider him a murderer, you have to consider me a murderer. And for that matter, Kira and your friend Dearka. They all are murderers if you hold Athrun for being one."

"I know," she sighed, "But… I'm afraid of certain things."

"Like… the fact that you think that he'll be replaced in your heart by someone else?" He paused to look at her face, "Mr. Tolle Koenig was your best friend before he was anything else, right?" At her nod, he continued, "So the fact that Zala is making a breakthrough with you makes you scared, right? You think that you'll forget him. But," he smiled happily at her, "You won't. The people you lose will always be in your heart. You already know that, I think, but are too scared to try to be his friend, no matter how badly you want to be."

"Yeah," she said, dropping her gaze to the floor, "That's it exactly."

He grinned widely, "I'm glad that I could help you, Miriallia."

"Thank you," she whispered as he exited her room and slipped back into her bed as she heard the door slide shut. "Thank you." For once she didn't sleep fitfully. She only hoped that it would last.

---------------------

When she saw Athrun in the morning, he looked half dead. Well, she may have only looked half alive, but she was determined to get what she wanted to say out of the way before more people started showing up in the rec room. With determination, she marched over to him, watching as he rose his shocked eyes from his coffee. But, soon they were veiled and guarded and she couldn't tell what emotion they held or he felt. "Athrun Zala," she said formally, bowing slightly, but stayed that way to his surprise. She knew that if she looked at him she would lose her composure and determination all in one sweep, "I came to make an apology for my rude behavior in the past." He said nothing and Miri sensed that he was still in a state of shock, "I want you to know where I come from when I say that I can never forgive you."

He snorted, "I already know."

"No," she scolded him, a grim expression on her face, as she stood up and looked him strait in the eyes. They were actually a rather pretty color of blue and green; they weren't the eyes of a killer, as hard as she found that to believe, "You don't."

"You seem to forget," he said, "That Kira, who was my best friend in the past, killed one of my current best friends at the same time that your boyfriend was killed. I think that I have a good idea of what kind of pain your going through. But, if I held a grudge, then I wouldn't have Kira as a friend. He's my support. I'm glad that I don't blame him."

She knew what he was trying to hint at. He was hinting at the fact that he wanted her to forgive him and he was using his relationship with Kira as an example. "Tell me Athrun," she asked darkly, "Did your best friend who died ever hold you in his arms? Did he ever kiss you? Did the two of you sit around and talk about things that you couldn't talk about with anyone but someone you wanted to spend the rest of your life with?"

Flushing, he turned away, "No. We never did any of those things."

"Yes," she continued, "Our pain is similar, but it isn't the same. Remember that." But, with a groan she ran a hand through her hair, "But, I didn't come here to talk about that. Well, I did, but not in that way. What I wanted to say is that I made a promise to someone I loved. I will never forget him. And somehow, you're threatening that. And it scares me," she blushed and looked down at the look in his eyes. They were so full of compassion and sympathy and confusion that it overwhelmed her, "I promised him that I couldn't ever forgive the one who killed him. He might not have been here to hear the promise or make sure that it's kept, but it's the thought that counts. No, I can never forgive you." She looked up again, slightly scared to see what his reaction would be, "But I don't want us to be enemies. I want us to… be sort of friends. Maybe not all the way, but I do want us to at least have some form of friendship. I find that that's important."

"What if," he took a step closer to her and held her hand in his comfortingly. She was glad that it wasn't in a romantic sense or she might not have been able to handle it. It was nice to know that he wanted her to be comfortable, "I don't want to have any form of friendship with you?"

As if bitten by a snake, she jumped back and glared, snapping her hand out of his. For some strange reason, it made her cold and she wanted him to take her hand in his again. But, instead she turned and started walking out the door. Her offer of peace had been refused.

"Wait," he called to her, "I was just kidding."

She swung around, "What sort of joke is that," she yelled at him; now she wondered if there would ever be a day that she wasn't angry with him. She thought probably not. "I just offered you a sort of peace and you crack a horrible joke!"

He laughed lightly, as one would when in the company of friends. She wasn't exactly sure how she liked that, but she thought that she could deal with it. "I'm sorry," he held out his hand for a formal handshake, "Truce?"

Gingerly, then with a firm grip, she shook his right back, enjoying the warmth while it lasted, "Truce."

A/N: I found this entire thing rather confusing, personally because it had so many mistakes that I had to edit through. Yeah. Tell me what you think!


	8. The Final Countdown

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed or any of its characters. This is the final chapter in this fic. I'm kind of sad to be at its end, but I feel that it's complete. No, the characters weren't as fleshed out as you, or I, might have liked. Yes, it did get rushed. But all I wanted was eight chapters out of this. I've got other projects that I want to begin working on. Thank you for reading this and I hope you enjoyed it. Please remember to review and tell me what I should do better in my next fic; things that need improvement would be of great help.

Chapter 8: The Final Countdown

For some reason, Athrun found himself outside of Lacus's door, trying hard not to chicken out of what he was about to do and run away. He didn't think that he would, but his heart was pounding and his ears were drumming and for some reason he felt like he was about to be sick. Lucky for him, her door slid open before he could run away, even if it was to be sick. Lacus looked at him in surprise, "Athrun?"

He almost felt like running away when those eyes looked at him. They were so big and pretty and any normal guy would melt when they had to look her in the eyes. Athrun didn't have to worry because the sudden vision of Miri's deep blue eyes penetrated through his mind and he smiled at his fiancée shakily, "Lacus."

Bowing slightly, he took her hand. He had known her forever, but no matter what he always felt the need to be at least somewhat formal with her. She seemed like a porcelain doll that shouldn't be touched for fear of being broken. He hoped that he wasn't about to break her. "Did you need something," she asked in her slightly high, sweet voice. It sounded nothing like her singing voice, nowhere near as full or heart melting.

"We need to talk." Those words might have been the worst that had ever come out of his mouth. He knew what that meant for a girl. He had seen all the old romance movies where the guy breaks the girl's heart.

But, instead of looking like she was about to die and kill herself like all the girls did in the movies, she smiled politely, "Whatever would you like to talk about?"

"Us," he said, deciding that bluntness would be best in this situation. "Or what is lacking in us."

Her big, innocent eyes looked at him, growing bigger for a second, then smiled lightly, "I was wondering when you would bring this up."

For a few seconds, he said nothing. Then, swiftly, he removed the ring from his finger and handed it back to her, "Give it to Kira." He would never admit it, but he had the feeling that that was whom she was thinking of constantly nowadays. Besides the war and all the people who could potentially die. He saw the looks that they passed each other occasionally. If she didn't love him, she at least cared for Kira more than she had ever had for himself.

She nodded briefly, before smiling, "The girl you like." He looked at her in surprise, but she just smiled. The woman seemed to know everything that happened on the ship, even if she didn't realize it. "I hope that she likes you back."

As he walked away, he smiled over his shoulder and said, "She doesn't, but thank you. Maybe someday, things will turn in my favor." With that, he walked out of Lacus's life romantically and into the place that he felt had always felt more comfortable in: as friends.

------

Dearka watched with coolness as Athrun and Miri had made their peace. But when he discovered that Athrun had even went so far as to break off his engagement with Lacus, he was overblown with anger. He knew exactly what would come next: he would ask out Miriallia. And Dearka couldn't have that because he liked her. The thought had never crossed his mind that Athrun would actually resolve his conflict with Miri. He had implanted the seed in the poor boy's mind that he liked the girl and now he was even going so far as to ask her out. Well, he would if Dearka didn't move quickly enough.

At lunch he had caught up with the girl of his dreams and led her to the deck overlooking the mobile suits. It wasn't exactly the most romantic spot that he could have ever came up with, but it had to do for now. "Miri," he said, taking her hand in his and tried to ignore the fact that she seemed to want to recoil. Or at least just stretch her fingers a little because he was clenching them a little tight at the fear of rejection. "I…I want you to know that I won't let anything happen to you in the next battle."

She smiled at him and shook her head, "I know, Dearka. You've told me that a lot."

He frowned, "But I'm being completely serious."

"I know." She smiled, "I trust you. You won't let anything happen to me."

He nodded and continued, "So, I also think that you should know that I like you." He waited for it to settle on her that he was admitting that he was romantically interested in her and was pleased at the blush on her face, "And I want to know if… if you feel the same about me."

She paused and fear ran through his veins of rejection. It had never crossed his mind that she wouldn't like him, only that Athrun was probably preparing to make his move on the poor girl. "I," she looked down, "I don't think that I'm ready to handle a relationship, Dearka. At least not for a while yet. I'm still coming to terms with Tolle's death. I think that befriending Athrun was the actual start of my healing process." She looked down, still blushing. And, although he knew that he was being rejected, Dearka was inwardly happy. At least he knew that she wouldn't be going out with Athrun anytime soon. "I would rather wait a while before I start dating anyone. It might take a while, so," she looked kind of sad, kind of happy, as if she couldn't choose the proper emotion, "I would advise you not to wait around for me."

He smiled, "I'll wait as long as I have to, babe."

She only grinned in response as she walked away and 'coincidentally' bumped into Athrun, whose cheeks were stained red. Dearka watched in somewhat amusement as he apologized and turned away, but not without giving Dearka a hard look. It actually almost made him laugh. With a painful sigh, he watched as they walked away, realizing that from the beginning that he had no chance. And that hurt.

------

For a few seconds, they walked in silence, feeling Dearka's stare on their backs. But, despite that discomfort, the silence was comfortable and Miri was happy. Athrun, though, seemed like he was having trouble adjusting to the silence, and even though he was naturally a quiet man, he seemed to long for speech in this period. She couldn't help but note how he shifted uncomfortable and glanced at her. A few times, their hands brushed, and once she squeezed his hand in a friendly manner, trying to put him more at ease with his surroundings, but that seemed to make him worse. Finally, he stopped dead in his tracks at the end of a corridor looked at her in a manner that seemed to stare right through her. It was a cold, faraway stare, and she could only wonder what he was thinking. "I broke it off with Lacus," he told her after a few moments, "I think that she was actually quite happy with it."

"Oh," she genuinely didn't know what to say. There was still the fact that she was uncomfortable around him, despite the fact that she had made her peace with him. "I'm…. sorry."

He laughed, but it didn't seem true, "Don't be sorry. We had little to do with each other in the romance department. We were always just friends."

Again, she giggled nervously, although she tried hard to suppress it. "I… see." She wondered what he was getting at and how it was relevant to her.

For a few seconds, Athrun stared at her and she shifted on her feet; all of this staring was making her uncomfortable. "This might be goodbye for us."

That statement made her look at him sharply, wondering what he was getting at, "What do you mean?"

He smiled at her softly, one thing that she knew that back on Heliopolis, girls would go crazy for. "We're in a war. At any second we could be called into battle. At any second I could die out there or you could die here." He laughed tightly, "Wouldn't that be kind of ironic? You become friends with the killer of your boyfriend, and only days later he dies in battle himself. Perfect, wouldn't it be?"

Looking down, she shook her head, "Don't even say that." She looked at him, once again full of the intenseness that he was slowly getting used to. "We don't need another person to die in this war. Especially not someone who I know, whom I'm growing to care about!" She sighed and leaned against the wall, and watched as Athrun turned a shade of red, then went pale, then went red again. "I've had too much of this death and killing. I don't need any more!"

Within seconds, Athrun was in front of her, as if trying to protect her against the outside world, "I can't promise there won't be killing, because there will be. But, I'll protect you." To her, that promise seemed strange and vague and she didn't like it. But she nodded and watched in slow motion as he wrapped her in a tight, friendly hug, "I'll protect you." He whispered into her hair, not noticing how she shifted uncomfortably in his arms. This was too close; no one had been this close since Tolle. Slowly, she was able to squirm her way out of his hold; ignoring the strange look he was giving her. Instead, she laughed nervously, trying to cover up whatever had just happened.

"Just don't go getting yourself killed," she ordered him, while turning on her heels to walk away, ignoring her red face as if it wasn't there. Things were just getting way too strange.

--------

While walking to her room, she wondered what was happening to her. It wasn't like her to be so… squeamish. 'Maybe it's the fact that I have just become friends with the killer of my first love.' That would be a reason for being squeamish, but she didn't feel as though that covered it completely. Taking a deep breath, she attempted to sort through her emotions as she ran into Dearka. There was another thing that she didn't want to deal with at the moment. He looked at her, and for a second she thought that he was going to ignore her, but then he said, "Got done talking to Athrun?"

"Yeah," she smiled at him, "I hope…. I hope that nothing changes between us. I want to know if you think that we'll still be friends… at least until I might be ready to date again."

Groaning and furrowing his eyebrows, he looked away, then smiled, "Yeah, we can be friends. I guess. Just," he looked down the corridor she had just come from, "Don't do anything stupid. Like trying to date Athrun or anything."

She laughed, "Why would I want to date Athrun?"

When she noticed how carefully he was studying her, she almost flinched, but held back. "Just don't do anything stupid," he repeated before walking away from her. But, halfway down the hall, he turned back and smiled the smile that Miri knew he had become famous for among the crew.

---------

"I can't have you possibly doing anything to risk the safety of our crew or the mission," Murrue screamed at Miriallia over the blare of the alarms signaling that they were entering battle.

"I won't mess up," Miri pleaded, "Please, just give me a second chance."

It only took a split second for Murrue to nod; she had more important things to do than to argue with a communications officer.

"Justice, are you ready to deport," Miri asked.

"All clear."

"Then be ready to launch in five, four, three, two, one." The ship slightly shook as Athrun took off, into the heat of battle with Cagalli closely following at his heals. "There are six GINN models heading towards you."

"Send Kira to take care of them," Athrun ordered.

"He's a bit busy at the moment."

Athrun didn't reply. With a horrific sense of fascination, Miri watched as Athrun charged at the approaching GINN models and completely blew them up with little effort. And there was a distant thought buried deep in the back of her mind that this was exactly what had happened to Tolle. But she was too far in battle to let it get out. Murrue trusted her so she kept her thoughts down and focused on the battle.

She called, "All set? GINN models destroyed," she confirmed for him.

"Alright, then let's get going, Cagalli."

"Right," Miri heard Cagalli call somewhat distantly.

---------

There was a rush going through her system as she waited in line to see those who had been in the battle and injured. She resisted the urge to shed tears when she heard that Fllay had been killed; there would be enough time for that later. Only when she saw Murrue's blank expression as she talked to soldiers did she really realize what all they had lost. A sudden image of Mwu appeared in her mind; the man who she didn't know as well as she could have, who comforted her when she needed it. She could only imagine what Murrue must have been going through.

She choked back a sob when she saw the woman, though. Now she knew what she must have looked like at Tolle's death. It looked like the woman's life had just ended. Finding that she couldn't help it, she sobbed. Although she knew little about Mwu, she knew the man that he had been. He was always up for making someone laugh or help them in any way. He was the best of the best. And now he was lost to them forever. "Hey," she felt a comforting hand on her shoulder and looked back to see a banged-up looking Athrun standing behind her, "It's all right."

"I hate war," she told him.

"I know," he looked passed her and sighed, "Mwu la Flagga was a great pilot. He'll be missed."

"You're horrible at comforting." She told him, no joke in her voice.

"We still haven't found Kira," he told her, now worry was truly evident in his eyes, "What if we lost him?"

She paused, before replying. "He was my friend, too. We'll deal with it together." She slipped her hand comfortingly in his, giving it a small squeeze.

Glancing at their clasped hands, he answered, "Together."

A/N: Well, that's the end of The Longest Yard. I hope that you've enjoyed it all the way till the end. So what did you think? I think that my favorite scenes for this chapter was the first one and the very last one. Thank you, my reviewers.


End file.
